There's a point when you don't care if there's a light at the end of the tunnel or not. You're just sick of the tunnel. - Ranata Suzuki
Face walked across the grounds, steering clear of both the Ables and the guys. He knew Murdock was coming over later for the big celebration party. Stockwell had let them know the pardons would be finalized within a couple weeks, and he'd be giving them a stake to get started on their new lives. Of course, he didn't say how much it would be, and Face didn't really care. The team's various investments over the years hadn't been touched - Face had been too careful hiding them from the prying eyes of the military - so they had more than adequate funds by themselves. Once they were out of here, back in LA, he'd go over everything with the others and start moving things around so they could have easier access.
In their own names, of course. The one thing he could look forward to. Then again, Frank had asked him if he would start using his 'real' name once they got the pardons. He hadn't even thought about that. It raised some interesting questions. If Hannibal went through with his plans, Face would have to re-connect with his contacts. They wouldn't know Richard Bancroft. And it would mean going to court to have it made legal. Seemed like a lot of hassle for something that really meant nothing of significance.
But then, the whole pardon thing was turning out to be a big hassle. At least as far as he was concerned.
He stopped by the fence, leaning against the top rail. He knew he wasn't completely healed up. Still, he pushed himself. There were expectations to be met, unspoken though they might be. There always were.
Always would be.
Unless...
He sighed, glancing around the meadows that surrounded the compound. He wasn't sure he wanted to continue fighting thugs in the park. All those years on the run, he'd dreamed of the day their names would be cleared and he could move on to have a real life. Put his talents to use in a legal way. Settle down, raise a family. Have a place to live that meant he didn't have to worry about leaving things behind when he ran...
Every time he'd talked about it before, Murdock claimed Face would get bored living that sort of life. He'd said it so often Face had stopped even mentioning it. Especially when the others had chimed in, agreeing with Murdock's assessment.
That didn't mean he didn't think about it. And the more he thought about it, the more he wanted to find a way out. Lord knows he tried. Once, not by choice, but still... But he wanted to find a way that would keep his friends, but only as friends. No more team. No more teammates. Just... friends.
Hell. There was no uncertainty in his mind at all. He did not want to go on fighting the bad guys. He was tired of the bad guys. He was tired of being one of the good guys, fighting for "truth, justice, and the American Way".
He was just tired.
He could liquidate his share of their holdings and just hit the road. Travel freely, openly, wherever and whenever he wanted, not having to worry about anyone chasing him or him having to chase somebody else. He wanted that so badly he actually shuddered just thinking about it.
But would it be worth leaving the team? Losing that connection? Would they even accept it? Not without a fight. Murdock in particular - he'd try to talk him out of it. Guilt him out of it. And Hannibal... Would he just let him go, the way he had before?
Damn it. He couldn't have it both ways, could he? He wanted to go, wanted to be free of the team, but he wanted them to fight to make him stay. And then let him go and stay friends anyway. Walk away from them and yet keep them.
God, he was tired...